Royal Enfield C5 advertised for sale with a bit of humor

This seller adds a light touch to his ad for a Royal Enfield C5.

An ad for a Royal Enfield C5 on CraigsList in Richmond, Va. is clever enough to bear quoting at length. Seller Rick Higgins is not only funny, he neatly expresses what's nice and what you should consider when buying a Royal Enfield.

His asking price is $4,900. Check the ad for full information, but here are just the parts I most enjoyed:

OK boys and girls — here it is. Your next/first bike. A 2011 Royal Enfield Bullet Classic! And no, this isn't what you think you know. What you have here is classic styling with modern technology. Gone are the carbs. This one is fuel injected. And all of the old comments of "fun, but needs lots of maintenance" are also long gone. This is the redesigned UCE engine. Practically bulletproof. Still fun though.

OK, let's go to the question and answer period:

Q: Why are you selling it?

A: Because I don't need it anymore. I took this in on a trade (from a dirt bike), and while I like it, I just don't use it. My riding style is primarily touring, and of all the things this does well, touring isn't one of them.

Q: I'm short, will this fit me?

A: Yes, and this is your lucky day. The previous owner was also vertically challenged. So I have lowering shocks, a shaved/lowered seat, and lowered seat springs in the garage — which will put this thing down low enough for five footers.

Q: I'm not short.

A: That's a question? Well, in any case, neither am I. I'm 6-2 and 250 pounds and I fit just fine.

Q: What do they call that license plate thingy?

A: A pedestrian slicer. Not that it makes any difference in the sale, but I wanted to get that phrase in here.

Q: What's the best thing about this bike?

A: Wow, thanks for asking. I didn't expect such a softball question. The best thing, beside being a hoot to ride, are the comments. And you will get them. No one will believe the bike is a 2011. I've had people roll down their windows and shout out compliments at 50 mph. This bike WILL get noticed.

I won't go into the used car speech about how it's both a great starter bike and also a great bike for experienced riders (oops, guess I just did), but it is all that. If most of my riding was local, this would be the bike I keep. It's great in the city. But my riding isn't local, so off she needs to go.

And no, test rides aren't allowed. Unless I either know and trust you (two separate things, by the way), or you plunk down a deposit before you skedaddle off. Say, $4,900. So hurry on by; supplies are limited. And since today is currently 62 degrees, I assume this will be gone soon. It's RIDING TIME!