Kick starting an Enfield keeps you humble

Graph illustrates the odds of your Royal Enfield Bullet starting on the first kick.

What are the odds your Royal Enfield motorcycle will start on the very first kick? If you follow the starting procedure perfectly, and the bike is warmed up but not overheated, the odds are actually very good. The only problem arises if someone is watching.

Royal Enfield motorcycles delight in making you look like a fool in front of friends, loved ones, and, especially, attractive members of the opposite sex. How does an inanimate object know that, instead of merely trying to go someplace, you are trying to show off your ability to kick start a mighty beast into life?

I don't know. But my Royal Enfield Bullet knows. To foil me it has moved its own kill switch into the "off" position, and developed instantaneous fuel starvation or flooding.

The fortunate thing is that when the friend, loved one or attractive person gets bored and wanders off, the Royal Enfield will cheerfully return to full operational duty. It's not disloyal; it just wants to keep you humble.

The graph above was produced on GraphJam, a fun web site that features the humor of people perplexed about such topics as why a bed is always most comfortable when the alarm clock goes off. It is well worth a look and you might even want to make a chart of your own. Thanks to my daughter Erin for pointing it out to me.