When people let their emotions drive

 When real self-driving cars finally arrive they presumably will not offer driving modes for "Bully," "Road-Hog," "Tail Gate," "Revenge Honk," or "Grand Prix."

Human drivers, however, do operate in those modes, frequently. We know these anti-social outbursts when we see them.

And I see them a lot.

We live in Florida, but my wife and I have a tiny studio apartment above an alley in downtown Washington, D.C., so we can visit our kids, who live in D.C.

Being on an alley, the garbage trucks and delivery trucks arrive early and often. Luckily we are not light sleepers.

The alley is laid out in a "T" shape, with only the base of the "T" connecting to the street. The arms of the "T" are both dead-ends. The leg of the "T" is narrow, so narrow that only one vehicle at a time can use it. The arms of the alley are just barely wide enough for two vehicles to pass.

It's actually fun to watch the professional truck drivers wheel their massive vehicles through the tight spaces and around other vehicles. But, human nature being what it is, it is EVEN MORE fun to watch the occasionally inept driver try it.

I just thank goodness it isn't me at the wheel, as they struggle, edging backwards and forwards in the turn, denting fencing, and tearing off the occasional rain gutter in the process.

But the real fun comes when difficulty leads to frustration and confrontation.

One recent morning an incredibly long truck arrived, delivering an oversized but empty dumpster to a construction site on the alley. It squeezed in, but the ballet was only beginning.

The driver would have to drop the new, empty, dumpster in a corner of the alley, then maneuver and pick up the old, full-to-the-brim dumpster, move that to a different corner, return and pick up the empty dumpster, move it into position for use, then maneuver again to pick up the full dumpster and carry it away.

This was in progress when a lady in a new Mercedes pulled out of the condo garage in the alley and encountered the truck, nose-to-nose. She couldn't get past him. He couldn't get past her.

Things could have gone in a couple different ways. They went straight down hill.

The truck driver laid on his air horns and kept them blowing for a good long time. The sound might have been sufficient to blow away any ordinary driver, but not this lady. She backed up. Just a couple of feet; just a bit short of how far he would need to get by her.

The truck driver now dismounted and approached the Mercedes. The woman did not roll down her window to negotiate. No one would suggest she do so, but the effect of this was that the truck driver had to shout and gesture wildly in an attempt to communicate. He appeared to be insane. I assume, at this point, that the lady was dialing the police.

The truck driver now resorted to cyber threat. He got out his iPad and began photographing the Mercedes, an obvious threat to bring charges. The lady wasn't intimidated. The truck would just have to back up and let her by.

So the truck driver got into his cab and backed up. Just a couple of feet, but enough for her to squirt past him. Instead of turning down the leg of the "T" and being on her way, however, she remained in that arm of the "T," still effectively blocking the whole dumpster-shifting operetta.

I assume she was on the phone with police, seeking satisfaction. I guess the dispatcher finally explained that police getting around to solving a problem like hers would probably not be the day's top priority.

No sense waiting. She finally did get the Mercedes in gear and turn into the leg of the "T" to exit.

She didn't get far, however, because there was an SUV, inbound, waiting for the dumpsters to move so it could turn into the alley. SUV and Mercedes came nose to nose. Neither budged.

Eventually, the SUV driver relented and began slowly... slowly... slowly... backing up the leg of the "T" toward the street. And then, when he did reach the sidewalk, he carefully, ever so carefully and slowly, edged out into the street and then pulled alongside the curb cut -- blocking the alley exit so the Mercedes couldn't leave.

By now obviously enjoying himself, the SUV driver crawled forward on the street, eventually creating enough of an opening for the Mercedes to cross the sidewalk.

But now, with its front wheels on the street, the Mercedes came to stop. Sweet revenge! Now the SUV would not be able to reenter the alley.

Satisfied with her triumph, the lady did eventually drive away and the morning's drama was at an end.

Would any of these people care to see their behavior through my eyes? Do you see yourself any of this? I hate to admit it, but I know I am guilty on occasion.